After talking about suits and shoes, it was time to talk about them again, but for a very specific occasion: the wedding as a guest. More than an advice video, I really wanted to give you my opinion on what I like… or not.
Disclaimer: I'm not married, so this video is my opinion from a clothing enthusiast on marriage as a guest, and not that of a man who had to wear the wedding ring!
In the last 3 – 4 years, I would say that I have attended between 10 and 15 weddings, sometimes in very different atmospheres.
1. Don’t steal the spotlight from the groom
So that's a fear that I find is sometimes totally exasperated .
“Not doing too much” should not turn into “not doing it at all”.
Because some people are very afraid of overshadowing the groom , but don't worry, it's not you who will find yourself signing the marriage contract on a misunderstanding.
Because the general observation is that I find that for a wedding day, a day of celebration, of celebration, most of the guests dress almost too soberly.
For some people, it's as if they just put on the same suit, shirt, tie, and shoes that they would have worn to work (at a time when people went to work in offices in buildings and where you had to dress specifically for this occasion, a whole concept).
Of course, you shouldn't steal the show, but you don't have to wear the same outfit you would wear to work in a bank.
I think it's a good guideline to have in mind: if you're going to a wedding with an outfit that you could copy and paste to arrive at the office on a Monday, that means that you still have room to “pimp” yourself a little more.
2. Who is getting married: the profile of the bride and groom
So the first thing to do is to ask yourself: who are the bride and groom, what is the general atmosphere of the wedding?
For example, I have a pure Basque cousin, who had a small Basque metal/rock music group.
So here, it's more of a wedding where I will wear a shirt a little cooler than a poplin, like a chambray or denim shirt with a collar suitable for wearing a tie, an Oxford shirt with a pointed collar buttoned , or even a linen shirt, but always with the collar suitable for the tie, even if you don't wear one (simply because it looks better when you wear a jacket).
As for shoes, since at 3 a.m. the track is likely to be wild with Basque rock, I'm going to wear a pair of very comfortable shoes that don't worry much, but on the other hand impeccably well polished, always!
Conversely, if I have a wedding of a friend who is passionate about clothing, who makes his suit in a Neapolitan workshop, there I will wear a shirt in a beautiful, refined and elegant dobby and there I take out the A ubercy.
Sneakers or no sneakers on a wedding day?
So, even if it's the big trend for minimalist sneakers worn with a suit and I've already seen them at weddings, I would say that... no.
Because sneakers are everyday shoes and at a wedding, well, you shouldn't dress like every day, because it's not a day like any other.
And then it's the right opportunity to take out your superb pair of double loops with which you wonder what occasion to wear it throughout the year.
3. What color suit?
In general, and from what I have observed, people who are around my age, we are a generation with much more freedom, less attached to the codes of yesteryear.
This is a good thing !
In summer, on hot, sunny weddings, I find that anthracite doesn't work very well, even more so on a simple smooth wool. At the moment, I find it very difficult to relax this type of costume.
That said, I once had a wedding in the Basque Country in April, my cousin's, on a cool day with gray, rainy skies and I had my gray flannel Husbands suit on .
So at the wedding, you may have heard about the royal blue suit, this rather pronounced blue which is far from unanimous among the team .
For my part, I find that if it is to wear it on a simple cold wool, that is not of much interest either.
For me what matters is the fabric, its composition and its texture. The color comes almost as a second step.
But in general, I am in favor of staying in shades of blue, because between the mixtures of materials, the textures, the micro-patterns , you have something to please yourself.
Personally, I am a very big fan of petrol or duck blue , especially SummerTime by Loro Piana.
But otherwise, by a stroke of chance, the fabric that Nicolo chose for his mother's wedding and the one that I had a friend take for the wedding, was also a Loro Piana Summertime , blue, but with a very light prince of galle who brings pep.
If you are invited to a wedding, even if I am in favor of you having an outfit of your own, I will tell you to go really easy on atypical colors like burgundy or very pronounced greens , but given how in France we is often terrified of color, there is little chance that you will end up with a suit that is too colorful .
4. Which fabric to choose so as not to die of heat ?
As part of a summer wedding , I am a huge fan of fiber blends, like wool, linen, or linen and silk fabrics, or my favorite, wool, linen and silk, it's the flagship blend. Loro Piana fabric, from the Summertime range.
This is a range of fabric that I love, because it's a fabric that breathes a lot, and the colors are magnificent. I only wear this in summer.
So I'm not going to dwell on this fabric, because since it's the fabric of our Breno suits and the jacket that I'm wearing, a jacket that I already wore to a wedding in fact, I I've already talked about it a lot.
Also think about seersucker, this fabric with a woven look . very cool . Given that it already has a fairly strong texture visually, for this time I advise you to take a relatively sober color, like navy blue.
On the other hand, in summer, there are two false good ideas:
- The 100% linen suit, which will probably be wrinkled after 2 hours,
- The suit in 100% cotton, which risks retaining perspiration odors and I find that the way this material hangs on a suit is not always very flattering.
If you have a wedding in winter or spring, where it will never be more than 20°C in the middle of the afternoon, I advise you not to hesitate to take a nice 100% wool flannel, otherwise you risk being cold.
And don't hesitate to take patterns like stripes, houndstooth, Prince of Wales , etc.
5. Crossed or not crossed?
As I told you in my Let's Talk Clothes about the costume , I like both.
Regarding a wedding, the double breasted is very cool , but it is a little stronger than a “simple” suit.
If you're not sure where you're going in terms of marriage, that's not what I would recommend.
On the other hand, at a wedding where there are open people who like to dress, I would like to wear a cross.
As for the three-piece suit, then it’s really not my thing.
You're already adding a layer of fabric even though it's summer.
And I think it's more reserved for the groom.
6. Mismatched or not?
Ah the big question! Should you wear a full suit or a different color jacket?
For me mismatched is really when you know what you're doing, and to be honest, apart from Pitti , it's rare that I've seen ones that appeal to me much more.
But when it's successful, I find it very nice, elegant, original and relaxed at the same time.
And this too is to be reserved for weddings where you know where people are open-minded and/or they like to dress.
But mismatching is an art and we could almost do an entire episode on the subject.
7. How to Survive Themed Weddings
Ah the famous country-themed wedding, or with the required accessory!
I'm not going to lie to you, sometimes I find that the chosen theme doesn't speak to me at all, but really not.
For example, I have a friend who has to attend a wedding and since he is one of the relatives, he has to wear a tie of a very particular color, quite fluorescent I would say.
It's painful but you have to deal with it.
And there are always people worse than yourself, I'm thinking in particular of women who have a fuschia color imposed on them for their dress because the bride wants the bridesmaids to have all the same color in the photo.
You have to respect the theme, it's not your wedding.
Improvise, adapt , overcome as the Navy Seals say .
And depending on the margin of freedom you have, you can put your little touch on it. And if you have any doubts, don't hesitate to ask the groom for advice two or three months in advance so as not to disturb him in the middle of a rush and to be able to find another solution.
For example if it was a wedding with a floral theme, knowing that I won't need to buy a new suit or new shoes, I would think about putting a little budget into a floral buttonhole from Cinabre rather than 'u ne tie with floral prints.
( ah yes, a little aside, Howard's and Cinabre are my two go-to addresses in Paris for everything related to ties, bow ties and pocket squares ).
8. Accessories: not to be underestimated
When you're invited to a wedding, accessories play a huge role in the outfit and I'll tell you what I like.
For me, there is one that is essential but that we rarely talk about: sunglasses.
Well yes, a wedding in summer there is sun, you are going to be outside all day, you are going to have your photo taken, so to be comfortable and not have a face that grimaces in the sun, you need nice sunglasses!
So I'm not going to elaborate because I did an entire episode on the subject , I'll put the video in the description for you.
As for ties, I remind you that pine green is one of the most versatile colors in ties (well obviously maybe not with a green suit) , in any case I have a green Husbands tie , in knitted silk, which is not very young anymore, but which I wear very often.
I would like to take something fresher in appearance, so I am opting for a shantung silk tie always with the idea of having texture.
Then we move on to the cover.
So if there’s ever an opportunity to put one on, it’s now!
In terms of color, I am also part of the camp of those who think that the cover should not be over-intellectualized, that the match should not be absolutely perfect and that the cover is there to bring a little spontaneity , a touch of the unexpected except, unless you're wearing a suit with a really atypical color.
In this case , I will choose a beautiful white pouch, even if it is textured.
But you know, one day I had a discussion with Hugo Jacomet from Parisian Gentleman, whom I salute, and he said to me “you know covers, I have dozens and dozens of them, and I always end up putting my rust-colored pouch, it really goes with everything and there is originality without overdoing it.”
So if you wanted to know what the ultimate pocket square color was that goes with everything, you have your answer!
Now let's move on to another underrated accessory: knee-highs , those socks that go up to the knee.
Why are socks so high? Because if you're sitting and your pants ride up, and your calves are visible between the short sock and the pants, it's not very elegant.
For my part, I am a very big fan of the “Super-Solids” socks from Mes Chaussettes Rouges , they hold the calf perfectly and do not fall.
Or alternatively, you can wear moccasins with invisible socks , quite simply.
9. Not to do on the wedding day!
I also find that certain details can ruin an outfit:
- A tie knot made with difficulty: we did a tutorial on Youtube, there is ZERO excuse for not knowing how to tie a tie knot correctly.
- An unironed shirt collar, the classic where we say to ourselves “I'm not going to iron it, I'll find an iron in the lodge or hotel where we'll be”.
- A strategy that I strongly advise against, because even if you actually find an iron on site, if it has been poorly maintained and it starts spewing burnt limescale when you turn it on, well your shirt she's screwed.
- Shirt collars not properly placed over the tie once you've finished the knot, a detail that takes 3 seconds to check in front of a mirror.
- Jacket lapels not correctly placed once the jacket is put on, again a detail that takes 1 second to check in front of a mirror.
- A cracked leather or pseudo-leather belt.
- Unpolished shoes, which I think is a shame for a day when you have to be the best dressed of the year.
- And I noticed it rarely, but still: frayed ends of laces. FYI, a pair of waxed shoelaces from Monsieur Chaussure costs the astronomical sum of €5.
That some people don't have the budget to buy a suit perfectly suited to their body shape and have it altered, I totally understand, but not having your shirt ironed, or your tie tied correctly, that's a no.
10. Managing others (especially when they are intrusive)
So weddings, if in the entourage of the bride and groom, there are "control freak" personalities, obsessed with controlling the smallest detail, this has exaggerated these character traits even more.
And in the worst cases it can lead to manipulative behavior, like “ah I would be happy if you were dressed like that, now I'm a little disappointed” but that's another subject.
When you have a person like that who will not agree with your rust-colored cover, think N avy Seals , you have to be in “improvise, adapt, overcome ” and life goes on.
In reality, you have to be very cash and say “I really care about this accessory, but if you really ask me to change it, I can see how to do it. What is your request ?"
In 99% of cases, requiring a request will cause your internal software to bug and you will be able to wear what you want.
